Tablesaw!

Hello, Google Profiles Team Member, and others!

There's not a whole lot I can do to talk to you as you go through this appeal, so I'm making this public post as the first informational link on my appeal, to help you get some context about what's going on here.

See, I was suspended on August 3rd. I appealed and was summarily rejected, but you asked me to send an e-mail for further review. The ticket number for that appeal was apparently #845437331. I sent an e-mail on August 4th. A public copy is here: http://tablesaw.dreamwidth.org/484324.html. Over the weekend, I waited to see if you'd respond or simply let it fall into the black hole of non-responses. But something different happened. My account went from having failed its appeal to having never had an appeal. At least, that's what it looked like from my profile page. I'm not sure; it's possible that my profile was reinstated and then re-rejected before anyone could see it. But I'm a little concerned that my last appeal, and the carefully considered words I sent you have been wiped clean from the last time.

But before we dicsuss theory, let's get to the links, shall we?

http://tablesaw.dreamwidth.org/profile

Dreamwidth is essentially my current base of operations on the Internet, where I am Tablesaw. This is a social network, where I am connected to hundreds of people who know me as Tablesaw. As you can see, I have archives for this name going back to 2002. Of course, many of those earlier entries are actually transferred from the previous iteration of this blog.

http://tablesaw.livejournal.com/profile

It was at Livejournal that I started the blog in 2002, and started to be known as Tablesaw to a wider web audience. Again, as a social network, LiveJournal introduced me to many people whom I now associate with offline as Tablesaw.

http://www.puzzlers.org/dokuwiki/doku.php?id=krewe:noms:tablesaw

Before that, I joined the National Puzzlers' League, an organization with over a century of experience using chosen names in "real life," as Tablesaw. Now, I know what you're thinking, Google Person. That website looks terrible and doesn't itself, vouch for my identity much. I'll admit, I don't use the website much either. But then, you've kind of placed yourself in a bind, asking me to prove things that happen in "real life" with links on the internet. You see, most of the NPL events happen off of the internet (where all of my friends call me Tablesaw), so the web presence is naturally still a bit sketchy. Of course, it's there where I met the woman who would become my fiancée as Tablesaw.

http://ifmud.port4000.com:4001/finger?user=Tablesaw

And before the NPL, I was on IFmud as Tablesaw. Again, an online space that translated into "real life" friends who call me Tablesaw. There was, for example, the time when a dozen or so of us got together and rented a house on the Outer Banks of North Carolina, something that we managed without ever having to use anything but the handles from the MUD.

https://plus.google.com/110575895677561507998/posts/YHtqJ5AXeAF
http://tablesaw.dreamwidth.org/482794.html

I don't know if you can see my own posts on G+ while I'm suspended, because I know the technology is still new. The second link is a backup. This link tells the story of the history of being recoginzed as Tablesaw by a small company that you might have heard of called "Google." See, it's hard to document my seven years of using Tablesaw Tablesawsen on my Gmail account as a link, so the best I can do is to tell you about it and assume that you can look up the information on your own. As they say in the legal profession, the documents responsive to your request are already in your custody and control. I can't tell you how to look into the history of my e-mail account, or my web history account (which I've also used since it was brought online).

https://picasaweb.google.com/tablesaw

Though I can show you the place where I've been using a Google social service under the name Tablesaw for four years. (Though, of course, I can't leave comments on most of my friends' pages like I could last month, because they're on Google Plus, and I'm suspended.)

http://www.geocaching.com/profile/
http://forum.caravelgames.com/member.php?Action=viewprofile&username=Tablesaw
http://www.croco-puzzle.com/Ue-Raetsel/ratinggraph.php?id=2249&type=all
http://forums.unfiction.com/forums/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=1460
http://www.gamersquarter.com/forums/profile.php?mode=viewprofile&u=159

And a further assortment of links to places where I'm known by Tablesaw on line, and where I interact with people who call me Tablesaw offline. Some of those represent places I don't visit much anymore. In fact, one person I encircled was someone from one of those fora with whom I hadn't really had contact in years, and I was so glad that using the name Tablesaw on Google Plus allowed us to find each other. Of course, that connection's gone now.

https://plus.google.com/110575895677561507998/posts/4hyoVecgxux

Finally, one more post from Google Plus, where one of the people I meet with weekly tells someone mocking my name, in no uncertain terms, that Tablesaw's the name they know me by.

Ok, links done, let's talk about your policy.

---

See, as I mentioned in that letter I sent to you guys last week, despite suspending me a bunch of times and linking me to your progressively updated Names Policy, nobody's actually told me what it is that's wrong with my name.

I understand that you don't want my legal or government-recognized name. That's good, because I don't really want to give it to you. (Though it does raise the question of why you'd asked for a But you do want "the name your friends, family or co-workers usually call you", and I've already given it to you—you've had it for over seven years.

Let's back up. Because, to be honest, there's a problem with your "Common Name" request, which is that I don't have just one common name. I've really got two. One of them I listed as my main profile name (in fact, as I said, I listed it as my main profile name seven years ago), the other I've listed as a nickname under privacy lock. I'm assuming that you can see that, with Google Profile powers, but I'm not going to mention it in this post, because it is, still, an open letter.

You're not really clear on what the difference is between a "common name" and a "nickname" really is. As far as I can tell, my two common names are also nicknames (since neither is, obviously, the name that my local government rigorously identifies me as). Now, I can see how helpful it is to have that other name in my nickname field, locked down under security so that only people whom I choose can see it, but beyond that, I don't see what your problem is with which common name I've placed where.

There's lots of reasons I don't want my other common name up in the big fancy spot on my profile. One reason is that the other nickname is rather close to the name by which the government rigorously identifies me. As you should be aware by now, what with the My Name Is Me campaign and other e-mails I know you're getting, is that making a name like that public opens one up to a lot of different forms of danger. And a lot of that ties into the circumstances I have two common names in the first place. Many people I know are aware of both names, and which they use at any given time is their business (and can switch in the same conversation sometimes). But the people who know me as Tablesaw (which includes a lot of people like my family (Hi, mom!)) have something in common: they are the people with whom I am more willing to share information about my life. And the people who know me only by my other common name are people whom I want to know as little about me as possible.

In other words, the social network that revolves around me as Tablesaw is far more valuable than the one that revolves around me as my other common name. More valuable to me, personally and emotionally, and more valuable to you because I'll be active in sharing with them.

And of course, there's the simple fact that I was here with this name long before Google Plus. When I went to initiate this appeal, the dialogue box that now appears eager to usher in a new name, wiping away years of history informs me that the name I change to is going to be changed in all Google products. Really? When just a month ago, it was perfectly fine for me to use all (and boy, do I mean all) Google products as Tablesaw, now you tell me that name's no good?

Well, maybe you do.

But you know—I know there's a lot of entitlement issues going around with Google Plus—but I do feel, after all this time, that I do deserve to be told why my name's not good enough for you anymore, if for no other reason than so that I can decide if I can change it for you.

Ok. I think that's it.

I hope you read all this, because I guarantee you, someone's going to.

And you know what? Depending on when you read this in relation to when other people read this, you can probably keep going down this page to see a bunch of my friends, friends in "real life"—and I guess I didn't even get to the part where somehow, "offline" is "real life," as though everything that happens on the Internet is somehow fictional (because, really, if online isn't "real life," then what does that make a web-based company like Google?)—tell you how they call me Tablesaw offline too.

I don't know if it even matters anymore.

After seven years, I'm starting to figure out what the cost will be of moving me e-mail address, simply because you think my name's not good enough for you and you won't tell me why.

Okay, it's late and I'm getting maudlin about this.

Best of luck with all this, Google Profiles Team Member. If you've read this far down, you deserve it.

And hell, you know what, I'm going to turn off IP logging, on the off chance that you want to leave a message. Anons get screened, and I won't reveal if you ask me not to.

Bed now. For reals.

Tablesaw out.

And now it's time for everyone's favorite game: Internet Headline or Random Nouns?

Crash Mars Iran Quake Rescue Bid

(pointed out by jrw)

Also, I am claiming creation of the words "philosotheory" and "commassacre". A commassacre is a flood or drought of punctuation that completely kills the meaning of a printed text. I don't know what the other one means, but it's mine. MINE!

The following poll was inspired by some conversation on ifmud about questions on the Cambridge exam for the Certificate of Proficiency in English.

Please don't look at the answers of others before you submit your own. Also, do not use any references. if you don't know an answer, just make your best guess or write "I don't know" as appropriate.

[Poll #299625]

And now, the finale:

( Without the ostrich )

( because the fresh ones are too sticky )

( Tannhaüser and Faust. )

( An eight foot python named 'Fluffy' )

( Zombie rats )

( Albino squirrels who pose for tourists. )

( Dreaming of big skies and milk gone sour. )

( 3.14169 )

Yesterday, I didn't get to bed early like I'd planned because I got obsessed with writing a cryptic crossword for ifmud. A few days ago, there was some group-solving of the current Atlantic Puzzler. Only one clue, actually. I logged on after the group had solved it, and they challenged me to solve it on my own. I did, eventually, then discovered that they were so ashamed of their prolonged inability to solve that they'd wiped the memory of the conversation from the @recap commands. Silly.

The next day, I enlisted their aid in finishing up some cryptics from the NPL convention by saxikath and Mr. E, with much more time dedicated to the latter. Mr. E's Jumble cryptic, with clues that may or may not have wordplay missing or adding a letter, was hard on its own, and explaining it was killer. I still have a few left on that one, which I may need to foist upon the Mud again.

Later, unable to sleep, I foolishly decided to whip up a simple puzzle specific to the Mud audience. The grid was completed rather quickly, which I later found out was a problem. See, I filled the cryptic grid the way I fill a standard grid, trying to add words which were unusual or which looked pretty. I forgot, of course, that later I would have to come up with clever wordplay involving each of them. This led to some headaches later on.

Eventually I unleashed the puzzle, and gleefully watched as a group of four had at the clues. There were many tweaks to be made, as things went on, but I was sad that my faulty memory of one IF game forced me to tank one clue completely. That's what I get for not rechecking the source.

Anyway, if you'd like, you can try the final version of the puzzle. Be forewarned, though, that several clues require knowledge of Interactive Fiction, or the denizens of the ifMUD. Also, you should probably know how to solve cryptic crosswords.

On Monday, I saw my friend Veek online. She's in town helping to take care of family and, although she's busy, I wanted to connect with her before the summer went ahead to far. So I asked if I we could go for a meal together. "What a coincidence," she said. "My friend Jon is in town visiting, and I'd love for you to meet him." ( So, a plan was set to go out Monday night. )

WedNYTX: 7:30. I have absolutely no idea what 34A is supposed to mean. WedLATX: 7.

My days are not your days; my times are not your times. When I say late night, you say early afternoon. When you say prime time, I say breakfast. When you say weekend, I say Monday Morning.

I still am never quite sure when a day is supposed to begin. At work, for example, I will work 88% of my eight-hour shift on June 13, but the time will be logged for June 12. And even though the calendar says it's Friday and the company says it's Thursday, for me, since it's my third working day of the week, it's Wednesday.

It's complications like this that lead me into trouble with things like deadlines when I tell IF-Review that, yes, of course I'll have my Anchorhead review finished by Friday, since Friday is the end of the week and the end of the week is Sunday.

Sigh. Back to writing, I guess.

FriNYTX: 20:21. Felt stupid for not getting 17A right away. ThuLATX: 11. FriLATX: 12.

Current poll is: Tablesaw dearlier than ever.

I've been writing this slowly, so I thought I'd post the beginning:

In recounting the tale of my vacation, I begin with the last day, which took about sixty hours.

On Friday morning, I awoke in Providence and packed my bag with toiletries, extra clothes and some warm-up puzzles to work on as I rode into Boston. veek drove me to the Providence Commuter Rail Station and I boarded the train into the city. It was a calm ride. Once there, I switched to the T and exited at Kendall Square, near MIT. davidglasser had provided me with some rather convoluted directions ("Turn right onto the street whose name I can never remember . . ."), but I was running out of time and followed them to the best of my ability. Although I went off track about half-way through, I still managed to end up in Building 4, my destination, and I quickly found ACRONYM headquarters.

It was about 11:50 a.m. and the entire team was heading off to Lobby 7 for the opening of the Hunt. I barely had time to drop off my things before I ran outside to follow Codex out the door. It wasn't until we were all gathered in the large main entrance of MIT that I got to stop and introduce myself to some of the team members who had assembled. This was the beginning of what was to be, for me, a weekend of many NPL introductions. It began with finally coming face to face with bookishfellow, thedan and saxikath, our team leader. I also got to finally meet davidglasser, whom I'd known from ifmud, and NPL member jangler, who happened to wander over to our camp (for values of "camp" equal to "pillar we were huddled around"). This was only a small corner of the huge room, packed full with people, all waiting for the puzzling to start. I distinctly remember on person holding up a large turnip. (I later learned that this was Team Turnips. Should've guessed, eh?)

This, by the way, at noon on Friday, is when the sixty hours began. All chronology henceforth is subject to being slightly muddled.

( Introduction )

( Round One )

( Round Two )

By now, I was very tired. I went into the sleeping room and took a nap. By the time I woke up, the Hunt had exploded.

To be continued . . .

I hate: traveling, airports, airlines, airplanes, lines, and not sleeping when dealing with all or any of the above.

I'm finally safe in Providence with my wardrobe and sanity intact. Thanks to my parents, my friends wjukknibs and K, my aunt and uncle, ifmud, and very especially veek for allowing this to be so.

I'm at veek's right now, and I just realized that this little thing down here is to warm one's feet up. It's amazing how people have come up with these New Englanders have developed ways to live outside the ideal climate.

I doubt I'll post again until Hunt, so have a good week.

Love,
Tablesaw